Intimism, Chapter 11

[Standard Content Warning: This is an ABDL story blog, that means stories on this page contain diapers, diaper usage (like, lots of it), infantilism and the like! In addition, mental and physical manipulation, bondage and nonconsensual or dubiously consensual employment of all of the above themes and many others may also apply. Viewer discretion is advised.] 

With an unenviable wet squishing noise, Evie sat up, propping herself against the bars of the crib and tried to just…take stock of her current situation.

‘I had that accident pretty much right after I refused to color in that page, just like the other time. And they were….worse accidents than I was having before. She grimaced as she felt herself fidget, her diaper swaying beneath her. That was a bit of an understatement. 

Between that, sitting in Inara’s lap so easily and the pacifier…’ On cue, she took another couple sucks of her pacifier. ‘…I think Amaya and I are around the same place right now?’ If not in terms of messiness, in terms of their “progress” towards…whatever Inara was trying to turn them into.

This immediately revealed some big problems. Firstly, each successive “failure” seemed to have a greater effect than the previous one. It had taken three "failed" assignments for her to go from leaking to wetting to messing herself. It had only taken two “successful” assignments for Amaya to blow past all of that and be in this clingy, dependent state where she seemed to have full-blown heavy messing accidents every few hours. And then it had only taken one more failure after that for Evie to draw even with Amaya. Everything was accelerating and getting more severe.

Now they were in totally uncharted territory. Something new was gonna happen the next time Inara gave Evie an assignment, one way or the other. And that next assignment, probably another picture to color, was certainly coming soon. At the latest, tomorrow, at the earliest, right after this nap. The idea of the latter made that pit open up in Evie’s stomach again. The way things were accelerating, whichever way it went, whether it was Evie or Amaya, it was gonna have a drastic effect on them.

There was another, more pressing problem. Evie and Amaya being even now meant that Evie’s failure hadn’t improved Amaya’s position. Evie had been really hoping she might snap out of it, just a little. She wasn’t hoping for her to punch Inara’s lights out all at once (okay, she was, but that was besides the point), but maybe just being less clingy or at least caring when she had a messy diaper. She was just as clingy and suggestible as bef—

“Mmmn…”

Evie turned her head as her train of thought was interrupted, first by a grunt from behind Amaya’s pacifier, then by a fresh set of crinkling, crackling noises. Evie pulled the blanket up and sighed into her own pacifier when she saw Amaya’s pink diaper bulging out a little bit more, but just a little. However big Amaya’s mess was (and from the way her eyes were narrowing and her cheeks were puffing out behind her pacifier, it didn’t look small), her diaper was only distending a bit, underscoring just how darn thick it was.

Evie let the blanket drop again. So Amaya was just as clingy and suggestible and accident-prone as she had been after Evie had colored in that second picture.

None of this was good news, Evie realized as she laid her head back down onto her pillow. She didn’t know what to do. As her eyes slid shut, she just really hoped she had some more time to think about it.

…

Unsurprisingly, changes didn’t come after they woke up from their nap.  Evie didn’t get her shorts back, either. It was probably just going to be t-shirts, diapers and nothing else going forward. Part of Evie wanted to think that was as as bad as it could get, but she remembered that drawing of Amaya in that fairy onesie….the more she thought about it, the more she doubted that garment only existed as a drawing.

When they were taken into the kitchen for lunch, there was something new waiting - a pair of wooden high chairs. Like the crib and changing table, they were big enough to fit Evie and Amaya. Evie just whimpered as she was sat in hers on the hard, flat wooden seat, which immediately squished her mess against her bottom. Amaya seemed less concerned with that and more concerned with letting go of Inara in general.

“Remember the bottle you had last time, Amaya, dear?” Inara said. Amaya kept whimpering, but gave a little nod. “You can have another bottle if you go in your high chair, dear. I promise I’ll be right here and if anything scary happens, we’ll put your headphones on right away, okay?”

“Mmmph….mmmm.” Amaya eventually nodded and stopped fussing.

“That’s my good girl, that’s my brave girl,” Inara cooed, nuzzling her nose into Amaya’s for a moment and giving her a kiss, which worked as the coup de grace of pacification, getting Amaya to sit down and let her tray be locked into place. With that taken care of, Inara started feeding them lunch. As promised, Amaya got a bottle. Both of them also got jars of what was clearly baby food, as well. Evie had noticed their meals gradually getting more and more infantile, but they were just straight-up being fed like babies now. She spooned every bit of food into their mouths herself, or at least she tried to. Evie brought a hand up and pushed Inara’s hand away when she brought a spoonful of the mush towards her.

“What’s wrong, dear?” Inara asked. Evie frowned at her. She wanted to say there was no way she was eating literal baby food and there was no way she was letting Inara spoon feed her.

“I don’t wanna eat it,” she grumbled, instead. Inara just gave her a little smile.

“Are you feeling a little picky, Evie?” She asked. Inside, Evie was back to really wanting to give Inara the finger, but she couldn’t even manage to put the words together to disagree. “Tell you what, dear, can you just try it for me?” She asked, moving her arm out of Evie’s hand and offering her the spoonful again. Evie had every intention of just refusing again, but her mouth opened up and allowed Inara to put the spoonful in.

“There we go, that’s not so bad, is it?” Inara asked in a sugary sweet tone. Evie just swallowed and let out a noise that didn’t mean anything. A few minutes later, she was regularly swallowing bit after bit of various pureed fruits and veggies. Evie grimaced, her attempt to refuse to eat the baby food being quelled almost instantly.

“C-can I have a drink?” She asked once she got thirsty - and immediately realized her mistake. She wished she’d asked for some water, but it was too late, as Inara offered her her own bottle.

“Here you go, dear,” she said and pushed the bottle into Evie’s mouth. Evie almost murmured an objection, but once the rubber nipple entered her mouth, she quietly started sucking. As much as the infantile way she had to drink it perturbed Evie, the milk still quenched her thirst.

When they went back to the spoonfeeding, Evie eventually noticed something. Each time Inara got a spoonful of mushy food for her, she held it just a little out of her reach. Which meant to eat another spoonful, Evie had to lean forward just a bit to get it. Evie didn’t think anything more of it than it was a little annoying - she was complying and eating Inara’s lousy baby food, did she have to make her put so much effort into it? -  but she didn’t realize she was rocking back and forth a little bit at a time each time she did it. She didn’t realize until she leaned forward and felt her stomach suddenly shift.

Evie’s eyes widened and she leaned as far forward as she could,  her body offering no resistance as she started pushing a new mess into her diaper. Evie felt a burst of panic. She tried to stop it, maybe sit back, but her body didn’t comply, instead staying leaned forward so it could more efficiently empty itself out. She winced, both at the unpleasant feeling of her own mess continuing to crowd her bottom and the sounds of it filling up the kitchen. She slowly looked around the kitchen…

To see pretty much no reaction. Amaya kept quietly drinking away at her bottle, seemingly not even noticing what Evie was doing. When she looked over at Inara...

“Open up, dear.”

She just pushed another spoonful of mushed veggies into Evie’s mouth, which she took in and swallowed without a fuss and then fell backwards onto her mess. The squish on her once-again-even-fuller diaper should’ve made her wince, should've made her try to fidget away from it, but this time, her body didn’t even react to it. She just sat down flat on the wooden chair, feeling her butt sink into her full seat, but she didn’t wince or grimace or whine. She still felt the discomfort of sitting in her own mess, feeling it crawl up her backside and between her legs a little more with each movement, but her body didn’t react to it.

“Come, Evie, let’s finish this jar, that’s a good girl,” Inara encouraged…and Evie obeyed, leaning forward to eat another spoonful. Nobody cared that she had just pooped herself in the middle of her meal…Inara wasn’t even reacting to it, not even to tease her. Her own body wasn’t even reacting to it.

It continued for the rest of lunch like that, Evie leaning forward to get a spoonful of food or her bottle, then sitting back in her full seat. When Inara switched to feed Amaya, Evie just sat there. She still wanted to fidget, try to move, do anything she could to lessen her discomfort sitting in this full diaper, but her body just wouldn’t. From the outside, both girls were utterly nonchalant about their situation, obediently eating as they sat in their full diapers (and in Evie’s case, continued to fill it).  When lunch was over and Inara unlocked the tray, picking Evie up out of the chair, she glanced at her diaper, and place her hand underneath Evie’s bottom to support her weight, doing a great job of squishing the mush against her backside once more, but she didn’t say a thing about it. Evie had a hard time thinking anything could’ve been worse than Inara’s constant teasing whenever she had an accident, but no reaction at all might’ve been worse.

She was sat down on the floor, rather than the couch, when they got back to the living room. She let out a noise into her pacifier and felt her arms raising up to reach for Inara. Inara noticed on patted her on the head.

“Oh, do you want to sit with Inara again, Evie?” She asked. Evie couldn’t stop her head from nodding up and down. “I’ll tell you what - can you try to do some coloring for me again?” She asked and gave Evie her box of crayons and the same picture as before, with Amaya in her fairy onesie. Evie’s heart immediately sank. She hadn’t had the rest of the day to figure this out, she’d barely had a couple hours. Inara left her staring at the picture and returned to her chair with Amaya. Evie was still staring at the picture when the TV turned on. She heard the noises of TV and the now intimately familiar MagiHeart characters, but it was all just a haze surrounding her head.

She turned her head back and looked at Amaya, curled up with Inara in her chair and she found herself wondering, was it even possible to undo any of this at this point? It felt like everything was just getting worse and she had no idea how to even stop it, muchless reverse it. Were she and Amaya gonna spend the rest of their lives in super-thick diapers, struggling not to act like babies? It had been frustrating enough fighting her own mouth to actually say the stuff she wanted to say and usually failing, now her body wouldn’t even listen to her anymore. It wasn’t resisting having accidents at all and now she was just sitting there, stewing in her mess, not even trying to find a more comfortable position (which she knew was probably impossible anyway) or try to procure a change (which she knew she wasn’t gonna get anyway).

‘What if we do manage to get out of here somehow, but we’re just…stuck like this anyway? What then?’ Evie asked herself. If Amaya was stuck like this, then she couldn’t guard Evie anymore, so would Miss Nightingale start guarding her again? So - what. Would Miss Nightingale take care of her infantilized daughter and be Evie’s….Nanny/Bodyguard? Somewhere in the back of her head, Evie was vaguely aware that Miss Nightingale had probably changed her diapers at least once in her life already. The idea of her doing it again was a disconcerting one. But she could at least imagine Miss Nightingale, with a huff, and a sigh, and a lecture that went something like…

“Do you see what happens when you go off to some remote location and send away your only proper protection, Evie? You get brainwashed by a demonic artist into this infantilized state, that’s what happens. Well, I still have a mountain of things to do, so you’re still going to be abiding by  that one change per day rule as long as I’m this busy and I think you know that I’m never not this busy. What? Oh, very well, you can sit on my lap while I do paperwork if you must. Come here, you needy girl. No touching the phone.”

That was exactly how that would go, she was sure of it. The thought of Miss Nightingale scolding her for getting into this mess almost put a smile on Evie’s face. She knew her former guardian would be upset, but at the end of the day, would probably take care of Evie and Amaya with little hesitation if that’s what they needed. She started trying to imagine how her own mother would react. That thought didn’t put a smile on her face, she just kind of grimaced and shook her head.

‘Let’s not think about that, actually,’ she decided. It was all besides the point. Whether or not this was irreversible, they weren’t going to escape this fate (and probably a much worse one - Evie didn’t know where the bottom was, but she still felt like she wasn’t particularly close) if they didn’t get away from Inara and the only way that was going to happen was if Amaya came to her senses or at the very least, didn’t get any worse. So, Evie realized…she had to stare into that uncharted territory and commit to failing again.

That was what she thought, anyway. But when she looked down, she saw a crayon was already resting in her hand.

Evie swallowed. It was easy to think that she needed to fail. When faced with the totally unknown but probably pretty awful consequences of it though…she was scared. She was really scared of what was gonna happen to her if she didn’t color in this picture.

‘M…maybe just a little?’ She thought to herself. ‘Maybe if I just do….50-50? Maybe if it’s only half of the effects to both of us, it won’t be as bad?’ She asked herself, trying to find any reason to do anything other than intentionally fail this assignment. That had been what all of her pontification about whether it was possible to reverse what had already happened to them had been about. If they were already screwed, if this was irreversible, maybe she should try to preserve herself. Maybe Amaya waking up wasn’t their only hope. Maybe she would find her watch or her phone. Or her family could realize something was wrong and come get her, right? This vacation had been scheduled for two weeks, which they were still only a few days into, but. Maybe if Mrs. Nightingale checked in and didn’t hear back, she’d come sooner…? Maybe she would rescue them, in which case - was it okay for Evie to try and preserve her own mind?

She looked at Amaya again and all of a sudden she felt sick. She couldn’t believe she’d thought about the idea of Mrs. Nightingale swooping in like some kind of hero to save her as a justification for actually considering throwing her only daughter under the bus. She couldn’t do it. She couldn’t do that to Amaya. She couldn’t do that to Miss Nightingale. So she threw the crayon down and pushed the paper away.

“I….I can’t,” she said, weakly. “I can’t do it. I don’t want to.” She expected it to hit her like a ton of bricks at that moment.  She closed her eyes, waiting for it to hit. She assumed it’d start with her pooping herself, why wouldn’t it? Then…what? Would she be unable to move? Unable to talk? Would her mind just go….poof and she wouldn’t remember anything anymore? The more she thought about it, the worse she felt, but she couldn’t stop her mind from wandering. After a moment, the anticipation was killing her, so she opened her eyes and looked around. Her eyes fell on Inara, who was just staring at her.

Inara had one eyebrow arched upwards. She put Amaya off to the side and stood up - Amaya murmured into her pacifier, but Inara gave her a quick shush and she complied, laying back on the chair and waiting for her to return. Inara, meanwhile, approached Evie and picked up the picture.

“You don’t want to color today, Evie?” She asked. Evie really couldn’t believe this. Did she really have to rub it in this much? She almost would’ve preferred she just got it over with.

“I can’t,” she repeated. That seemed to cause a change in Inara’s expression. Both of her eyebrows went up.

“You can’t? Do you mean you don’t know how?” She asked. “It’s easy, dear, you just take the crayon and color it in. You don’t even have to use the right colors or stay inside the lines if you don’t want to, it’s not that impor—“

“That’s not what I mean….!” Evie snapped, interrupting her. “I can’t…do it! I know what it’ll do, okay? I figured it out, I can’t do it!”

“You….know,” Inara repeated. Evie blinked.

‘What’s with her?’ She asked internally. ‘Why is she drawing it out so much this time?!’ Then, Evie’s eyes got a little bigger when Inara turned her head and looked at Amaya, then back at Evie.

“So you’re okay with what…you think will happen. If you don’t do the page?” Inara asked and Evie was pretty sure she heard doubt seeping into the woman’s voice.

“Of course not!” Evie said back, almost laughing in her incredulity Absolutely no part of her was okay with the stuff that had happened to her. But she was a lot less okay with the idea of having any more of a hand than she already did in doing it to Amaya. So she just repeated herself again. “But…I can’t do it. So I don’t want to.”

Up until this point, Evie hadn’t really seen Inara act at any moment as if something was happening that she hadn’t accounted for. Any time she had seemed to be surprised or shocked by Evie’s accidents was, she was pretty sure, just lying until she could get Evie in diapers and baby her as much as she wanted. But now, looking into her eyes and listening to the tone of her voice, Evie was pretty sure…Inara hadn’t expected that. Was she surprised that Evie had figured out what the assignments were doing? Was she surprised that she was intentionally not doing the assignment, despite that? Had she expected Evie to choose to save her own skin at the cost of Amaya’s? Evie wasn’t sure that was what it was.

Whatever it was, she was glad. For the first time since she’d started turning the two of them into her little baby playthings, this was the first time Evie had actually seen Inara even a little bit unnerved. It gave her a bit of confidence in her decision that she sorely needed.

“Well….that’s okay, Evie,” Inara said. “You…don’t have to color if you don’t want to,” she said, taking the page from her. Hearing Inara’s normally honeyed words sound shaken beneath the surface felt good too. Evie didn’t know if she wanted to try and claw open the crack she’d made  and get under Inara’s skin a bit more or if that was pushing her luck. She opened her mouth to say something, but nothing came out except a yawn. She covered her mouth with her hand and blinked a couple of times.

Then, she yawned again. Was she suddenly getting tired? She’d just had a nap a short time ago. Maybe the emotional toll of all of this was more exhausting than she thought. She considered getting on the couch and laying down, but when she tried to stand up, she just fell down, and for once, not onto the messy seat of her diaper, but down onto her side.

‘Wh. Wha?’

She tried to get up. She just flopped back down. She tried to raise her arms to push herself up, but they just flopped down uselessly. She didn’t have any strength in her arms or legs. She tried to get up one more time and this time, she did flop onto her back (with an unfortunate splat into her messy seat this time). She stared up at the ceiling and a few seconds later, Inara walked into view.

“Uh….” Evie murmured. Inara reached down, just to grab Evie’s pacifier and pop it into her mouth. It bobbed up and down a few times. Then Evie felt her eyes starting to fall.

‘I….I can’t move!’ She realized. Inwardly, she filled with panic as every attempt to just do anything to move her body came up with nothing. Outwardly, she had a placid expression on her face as she lay motionless on the ground. And she was trending towards drowsy as she yawned into her pacifier and it started to be a struggle simply to stay awake. The last thing she felt before her eyes closed was Inara’s arms reaching down and picking her up. The last thing she heard…

“I think Evie’s going to need an extra nap today.”