Intimism, Chapter 12

 [Standard Content Warning: This is an ABDL story blog, that means stories on this page contain diapers, diaper usage (like, lots of it), infantilism and the like! In addition, mental and physical manipulation, bondage and nonconsensual or dubiously consensual employment of all of the above themes and many others may also apply. Viewer discretion is advised.] 

“Mmmph….!”

“Mmmph!!!”

“Mmmm…..”

Evie was spending all of her energy trying to do two things:

1) Stay awake.

2) Move. At all.

She had failed the second objective and was circling the drain on the first. She tried to sit up and barely got a few inches off her mattress before she fell back onto her pillow. She tried to raise her arms or legs to pull or kick her blanket off, but they barely moved. It was almost like that feeling where you woke up from a nap, but your body hasn’t caught up yet, so it just won’t move for a couple of minutes, except no matter how much time passed, her body wasn’t waking up.

It was pretty obvious this was the consequences for failing another assignment. In the moment, she’d thought it was worth it just to see Inara a little unnerved for once, but now she wasn’t so sure. She wondered if she was even capable of speech anymore. She tried to take out her pacifier, but her arm wouldn’t listen to her, and by this point, all of these ill-fated attempts at physical exertion were catching up to her.

“Mmmph. Mmm…” She murmured into her pacifier. That was all she could manage as her eyes slid shut and she drifted off to sleep.

…

The lights were still out when her eyes were opening again. She sucked on her pacifier a couple times and was a little surprised to feel something hit her tongue. She instinctively swallowed - it was milk. Her eyes finished opening and she saw a bottle was in her mouth. She looked up. She was currently being carried by Inara and fed a bottle of milk.

“Welcome back to the world of the waking,” Inara said with a fond little chuckle. She looked like she was back to normal, which kind of annoyed Evie, but she couldn’t act too surprised. Evie had probably been asleep for a couple of hours, that was plenty of time for Inara to get her game face back on. “Did you have a good nap, my dear?” She asked.

“Mmmn,” was the only thing Evie murmured out as she kept drinking. She couldn’t bring herself to object as she realized her throat had felt really dry before that milk had started hitting it. The milk felt really nice in her throat and in her stomach, which had been empty until that point - on that note, Evie shifted in Inara’s arms, tensing up a bit, before pushing out a small wave of mess into her diaper. She felt Inara’s hand go down her arm and pat her bottom, and she realized the reason her stomach had been empty prior to getting her bottle.

“Did you make a little stinker during your nap?” Inara asked as she patted Evie’s diaper a few more times. “Hm hm…feels like maybe you made a few,” she teased lightly, getting a blush out of Evie. Her fairy diapers felt quite a bit fuller than they already had before she’d been put down for the nap. Had she been messing herself during her nap without even waking up or realizing it? That thought bothered Evie…the realization that she was still drinking from her bottle as she continued pushing out the last of her mess bothered her more.

“That’s okay, Evie, you’re just  making some more room in your tummy,” Inara encouraged. “Are you a little worried because you were having some trouble moving around before your nap?” She asked as she lightly rocked Evie back and forth.

“Mmmph…mmmn….” Evie couldn’t help it. Part of her wanted to put on her own poker face, not let Inara see how worried she was, but her control over her own body was way too far gone for that. She just weakly nodded as she kept drinking.

“It’s okay, dear. Even if you have some trouble walking, Inara will be here to help carry you. Even if you have some trouble eating on your own, Inara will be here with a nice full bottle,” she assured Evie as she tipped the bottle a bit. Evie felt more of the milk come into her mouth and let out a contented noise as she swallowed. Part of her really hated how much this bottle was hitting the spot right now, but it wasn't stopping her from gulping it down. “If you have to poop your diapers over and over, even after they’re already full, Inara will be here to change you,” she said. Then, right on cue, she let out another little laugh. “Although maybe not as often as you’d like.” And Evie was unable to keep from rolling her eyes. That was an understatement. “It’s all okay, dear. I’ll take care of everything,” she promised. “And I’ll love you just the same.”

Evie couldn’t help it, she felt herself getting taken in by Inara’s sentiment. Her current situation was scary, no doubt about it. She tried to remind herself that Inara was the one responsible for this, but the thought of just being loved and taken care of, even in this state, was a comforting one. So comforting it was hard for her to see it for what it was.

“Buuuut.”

The flow from the bottle slowed as Inara tilted it slightly away from Evie.

“A girl who has to take multiple naps a day because she’s so tired, needs to be carried around because she has trouble walking, drinks from a bottle because that’s all her little tummy can handle and needs big thick pink fairy diapers that she poops in until they’re full and then keeps pooping them after that…” She pushed on the seat of Evie’s diaper, making some of the mush flow in between her legs and up the front of her diaper. “A girl who happily drinks from her bottle while she poops her diapers and doesn’t even notice…”

Evie winced. She tried to remember if she’d even felt her stomach warn her that she was about to mess herself a minute ago. She wasn't even sure if that had been the start of her accident or if she'd already been doing it without realizing. Running down the hallway and stopping halfway there as she messed her MagiHeart panties had been humiliating, but at least she’d been trying to stop it. Now she didn’t even know if she could feel it anymore!

With a soft wet pop noise, the bottle came out of Evie’s mouth.

“What a girl like that called, dear?” Inara asked. Evie’s eyes fell. She knew what Inara wanted her to say. She didn’t want to say it. But the longer the bottle was out of her mouth, the more she felt the thirst gnawing at her. Even after drinking half of it, her stomach wasn’t satisfied. So she grimaced and slowly opened her mouth.

“….baby.”

She was immediately rewarded with the bottle being put back in her mouth and a kiss on the forehead.

“Good girl,” Inara whispered to her. Evie was having a pretty hard time not feeling pretty defeated in that moment. Earlier, she thought she’d managed to uncover some crack in Inara’s armor and get her at least a little bit off-balance by refusing to color in that picture.  Evie had dared to think for all of a minute or two that she might’ve been able to use it to some kind of advantage to help herself and Amaya. 

But the price she’d paid for refusing to color the picture had been…really, really high. Now Inara didn’t seem unsettled at all and Evie felt even more powerless. If there had been any tiny shift of this ever-present power imbalance back in Evie’s favor, that gap now felt wider than ever. And Evie didn’t know what else she could do at this point. She could barely move anymore.

Well.

At least when she’d admitted she was a baby, she’d proven she could still talk.

—

Evie wasn’t sat on the couch or the floor when they got back to the living room. There was a new piece of furniture sitting on the floor. A soft white baby rocker-style chair, unsurprisingly sized up to be appropriate for Evie. It occurred to Evie to ask Inara where the heck she got this stuff, but would any answer have satisfied her at this point? She doubted it.

She was sat down into the rocker, her butt sinking into the huge mess in her positively pummeled fairy diapers. Inwardly, she groaned. Outwardly her body didn’t react at all as she settled into what she was pretty sure was her biggest mess yet. The mess had already climbed up most of the backside of her diapers and when she sat down, she felt it crawling between her legs, slowly towards front of her diaper. She was unfortunately very used to feeling a messy butt by this point, but the idea of a diaper that was totally full both front and back was starting to seem inevitable. Five straps were pulled into place, coming into a five-point buckle resting over Evie’s stomach. She gave a little tug to the straps, but quickly realized that much like the six tapes of her diapers, she wasn’t doing anything to move them.

She looked around to try and find Amaya, but she couldn’t turn herself around enough to see the couch or Inara’s easy chair from her rocker chair. Continuing to twist herself and strain against her straps to do so would just tire her out. Every time she exerted herself (not that there were many ways to exert herself while strapped to a chair - there was pretty much just the one), she felt herself drifting off. She would just fall asleep if she kept moving around, so she pretty quickly decided to just sit back.

She would try to conserve her energy so she could talk to Amaya tonight. She was pretty sure it had to be tonight. She didn’t know what was gonna happen tomorrow. Another assignment seemed inevitable and she didn’t know if she’d be able to do it, even if she wanted to. And she didn’t know what would happen to her after she failed another one. For now, she could still talk, at least a little. She had to hope the effects of this stuff had reversed on Amaya at least a little bit  and that Evie could get her to clear her head enough for them to do… …something. It was a whole lot of ifs and maybes, but that was all Evie had at this point. She and Amaya had been the victim of a bunch of impossible stuff ever since they’d set foot on this island, at some point the impossible stuff had to go in their favor, right?

Conserving her energy and holding onto that hope was all she could do right now, so she sat back in the rocker chair and watched more MagiHeart. She’d been watching this show for a few days straight, even if some of it she was just absorbing in the background while she worried about other stuff like these assignments or, well…just that and pooping herself, mostly. She didn’t know if Yumi constantly going on about courage or her own arc about learning to deal with fear was going so far as to inspire her but seeing the young girl face her doubts about her ability to move past her injury and turn it into a magic sword she used to fight monsters with…well. It was something. She didn’t have a lot to draw energy from at this point, she guessed a 20 year old magical girl series would have to do it.

As if someone had been reading her mind, Evie looked down and saw her MagiHeart Sun doll had been deposited on her lap. She looked to the side and saw Amaya next to her.

“Oh, do you want to play with Evie, dear?” Inara asked. She patted the top of Amaya’s head. “You’re a good friend, keeping her company,” she said. And Evie didn’t want to agree, but it was a little heartening to see Amaya again for the first time since she’d lost all of the strength in her body. She wordlessly held up her own Moon doll. Evie tried to hold up hers, but her arms were immediately too tired to lift it, so she just dropped it into her lap again. Amaya seemed to catch her drift, there. Luckily, she didn’t seem to mind too much and took care of playing with both dolls for the two of them while managing to keep Evie involved by at least keeping things in her field of vision and occasionally bouncing the dolls on her lap instead of the floor. It was a little silly, but she appreciated that Amaya had decided to come spend time with her. It was more proof that even under all the stuff that had been done to them, her friend’s selfless nature was still there. It was a small comfort, but a comfort nonetheless.

Both girls had their pacifiers in, so the little playtime session went by wordlessly, except for occasional encouragement by Inara. Evie even drifted in and out a few times and she was pretty sure if she wanted to, Inara could’ve taken her back to the crib either for another nap or just an even earlier bedtime, but she left her in the rocker to let her keep playing with Amaya. Or, just sit there while Amaya played for the both of them. Amaya was still keeping her pacifier in, she still paused, puffed out her cheeks and pushed out a mess into her own diaper at one point before going back to playing all of a few seconds later and it was all in service of basically just waving and bouncing around a pair of dolls, but…Evie took notice of the fact that Amaya was up and doing stuff. She wasn’t just sitting in Inara’s lap, refusing to be separated from her for even a few seconds. Maybe it was a positive sign.

Eventually, though, 7 PM did arrived and Inara undid the straps of Evie’s rocker and lifted her up out of it. Amaya held Inara’s hand as she walked to the bedroom, something Evie noticed and hoped was another positive sign. She yawned into her pacifier and blinked a couple of times, then gave a little shake of her head to force herself to stay awake. She had to hope these positive signs she was noticing were A) actually positive signs and not just a coincidence, B) happening fast enough that they would be able to accomplish something before the next assignment came.

Evie got another positive sign in the bedroom, although honestly, not in the way she was hoping.

“Whew….Evie definitely filled up her fairy diapers a bit more than Amaya did today, didn’t she?” Inara asked. It was pretty obvious just by looking that her assessment was, in fact, accurate, but she gave the seat of Evie’s diaper a squeeze, then Amaya’s, just to make sure. If Amaya was less clingy and messing herself less often, that was another small ray of hope for Evie. But at this very moment, she was deciding she’d had enough of one thing, at least. She expended the effort to reach up and tug at the sleeve of Inara’s robe and murmur into her pacifier. Inara looked at her. She glanced at Evie’s diaper and gave it another little squeeze. She seemed to understand what Evie was asking for.

“You want a change, Evie?” She asked. Evie nodded and murmured into her pacifier again. Inara glanced at the ruleboard for a second and rubbed her chin, as if she needed to deeply contemplate this one. “Hmmmm.” She took a look at Amaya and her diaper too….

“Alright, dear, if you want a fresh diaper before bed, you can have one,” she said, laying Evie down on the changing table and getting a breath of relief out of the girl. “But!” Inara held up a finger. “If you get a change now, you don’t get one tomorrow, alright? Not even before bed.” Evie groaned into her pacifier. It wasn’t hard to figure out what that meant - by the end of tomorrow, she was probably going to be in an even fuller diaper than this one. She couldn’t help it. She knew it was sacrificing long term pain for short-term comfort, she just wanted to at least try sleeping with a clean diaper after spending all day (including two naps!) stuck in her own mess.

She nodded. Inara ripped open the tapes of her diaper and started cleaning her up. It was a relief to feel the at this point familiar (though not familiar enough, in her opinion) sensations of the wipes leaving her clean and the sweet smelling powder coming once she was fully cleaned up. She tried to hold onto that feeling, because she knew it wasn’t gonna last long and she was probably gonna have to endure a much longer, fuller diaper because of this little trade.

‘Just one more reason to make sure Amaya and I escape tonight, I guess,’ she thought wryly as her bottom was lowered onto a new pink fairy diaper that was taped up around her waist. Evie was laid in the crib while Amaya was offered the same choice, a change now, but no change tomorrow. Amaya, true to form, seemed to not care one way or the other, but took the change and after a less intense cleanup, she was in a fresh fairy diaper as well and was being laid down next to Evie.

“Do you want your headphones, dear?” Inara asked Amaya as she handed her her Moon doll.

“Mmmmnn….” Amaya murmured noncommittally. Inara seemed to pick up the meaning one way or the other.

“Alright, dear. I’ll turn them on and leave them next to you,” she said, doing just that, placing the headphones next to Amaya’s pillow. “You put them on if the storm scares you, okay?”

“Mm.” Amaya nodded. She put a hand on the headphones, but took it off, leaving them where they were. Inara turned her attention to Evie as she placed the Sun doll on the crib’s mattress next to her.

“How about you, Evie, do you want some headphones in case the storm gets scary?” She asked. The idea of the storm getting worse unnerved Evie for a couple of seconds, but she managed to force that idea down by reminding herself she’d been sleeping through storms like this all her life and just shook her head before she changed her mind. “Okay, dear, just call for me if you change your mind,” she said and leaned into the crib, giving both girls a kiss before she pulled the bars of the crib up. The lights were out and the door was closed a few seconds later.

Evie blinked the sleep out of her eyes. She looked over at Amaya. She already had her eyes closed. Evie was having trouble staying awake herself and if Amaya put on those headphones, Evie could forget getting her attention tonight.

It was now or never.

She forced herself up into a sitting position and then fell against the back bars of the crib. She huffed and puffed a couple times, already feeling a little tired just from that much, but she reached out and grabbed Amaya’s arm, shaking her a bit. Amaya opened her eyes and turned over, blinking confusedly at Evie. Evie just kind of opened her mouth and pushed her pacifier out with her tongue.

“Hey…Amaya,” she whispered. “I gotta…I gotta talk to you,” she said, already feeling her words trail off. She shook her head, forcing herself back awake and alert, or as close to alert as she could get. “We gotta—“

She was interrupted by a blue flash and a rrrrrrrrmmmmmmbbbbbb! Sound outside. It wasn’t as bad as the first massive blast of thunder that had scared Amaya into messing herself, but it was still enough to freak her out a bit.

“Mmmmmph!” Amaya squeaked into her pacifier. She sniffled and looked around, immediately grabbing for her headphones. Evie bit her lip - if she put those on, they were done for. She reached out and grabbed the headphones, tugging them away before Amaya could put them on.

“A-Amaya, please, just listen to me for a minute…!” Evie begged her. “You’ve lived through a thousand storms, you don’t have to be afraid of this one!” Amaya stared at her, a pitiable look on her face. The encouragement wasn’t doing much. She clearly just wanted her headphones back. Evie didn’t think she could summon the strength to pull the headphones off if Amaya put them on, so that wasn’t an option.

Case in point, another low rumble and Amaya let out another whine and this time pulled her blankets over herself entirely, not even making eye contact with Evie anymore. Evie hated to do it, but she couldn’t give up. She summoned whatever energy she had and pulled at the blanket.

“Amaya, please, just listen to me for a second!” She insisted.

“Mmmmghhstooouuuup…!” Amaya sniffled from under the covers, her pacifier partially slipping out. “I just want my headphones back…!” She said, her words slightly slurred from the bulb still half-hanging in her mouth. Evie couldn’t believe this. She couldn’t believe how bad her luck was turning out to be. She’d actually managed to convince herself that Amaya was improving and now that she actually had one more chance to talk to her, she was inconsolable because of a little stupid thunder! Evie felt all of her anger and frustration bubbling up to the top.

“Amaya, please, stop!” Evie snapped. “If you don’t stop being scared and wake up, then Inara is gonna trap us both as her babies forever! I can’t get us out of here on my own, Amaya, I need you to please, wake up!”

Immediately, she was afraid she’d been too loud and any second, Inara would come in and it’d be over. That might’ve been preferable to what actually happened.

“I want to be a baby!”

Evie's eyes got big. But they didn’t stare at the lump of blanket that currently housed Amaya, they just kind of. Stared forward, like everything behind them had been disconnected. She stared at nothing for several seconds. She eventually did look at Amaya.

“I….wh….what?” She asked. “I don’t understand….” That just wasn’t possible. She must’ve misheard. After all of this, Amaya couldn’t have possibly said…

“I don’t want to get out, I want to be a baby!” Amaya whined underneath her blanket. Then she poked her head out and Evie saw tears dotting her eyes. “I’d rather be her baby than be your servant!”

Those last few words in particular rammed right into Evie’s stomach like a hammer. She felt heat all over her body. She felt a pressure pushing on her chest. She suddenly wasn’t sure if she could even breathe. She hadn’t misheard her. But she had badly misinterpreted this entire situation. 

Amaya wasn’t under the same weird fog that Evie had been, where there was a disconnect between what her mind wanted to say and what her body did. Maybe she never had been. Amaya wasn’t going along with this because she was brainwashed. She was embracing it. She had just said it - she wanted it.

Evie had been right about one thing, though. Without Amaya, she couldn’t escape. And now, it was confirmed as plainly as could be. She was definitely without Amaya. And that meant escape was impossible. And Evie’s anger and frustration, that felt like it had been constantly simmering  near its limit for several days in a row, finally boiled over.

“Fine!” She snapped, reaching her hands out and shoving the blanket lump. “You want it?!” She threw Inara’s headphones. They clattered against one set of bars or another. “Then do whatever the hell you want!” She threw Amaya’s doll and her own for good measure. Then, for extra good measure, she added, “I’m sorry I tried so hard to save you!”  and got up, dragging herself to the opposite side of the crib. 

Evie was more or less just fueled by spite at this point, but she managed to pull her own pillow with her, drop it on the opposite wall of the crib and flop onto it. She was huffing, puffing and sweating by the time she was down again. All of that energy she’d saved up, and she’d burned it all yelling at her friend and throwing stuff. If this was her end, boy was it an inglorious one.

“I’d rather be her baby than your servant!”

Evie slapped her hands over her ears as the words rung in her head. She sniffled a few times and before she knew it, angry, exhausted tears were flowing. She wanted to blame something else. Like, all the things Inara had done to her body and mind had made her more emotionally sensitive. But she was pretty sure hearing those words would’ve make her cry no matter what.

She didn’t know if this was the bottom. But it sure was hard to imagine it getting any worse.

…

“Hfff….”

Amaya sniffled and wiped her eyes. She wasn’t exactly having a great night either, after all of that. She’d tried to put her pacifier in and go back to sleep after Evie had yelled at her, but she couldn’t do it. After trying for a while, her eyes just kept opening again and she felt tears dotting at them.

Evie was mad at her. But she didn’t wanna think about that anymore. She just wanted to go to sleep. She looked at Evie, laying on the opposite side of the crib. She was up against the edge of the crib and currently turned over on her side so her back was to Amaya. She was basically as far away from Amaya as she could get while still being in this crib. Amaya quickly decided she wasn’t going over there.

So she looked around the crib instead. She saw her Moon doll. She put her pillow under her arm and shuffled over to that, putting it under her other arm and giving it a hug. Being reunited with her Moon made her feel a little better, but not enough to fall asleep. She kept looking around. And laying in the middle of the crib was her headphones. She crawled over to those next. She set her pillow and her Moon down in the middle of the crib and picked up her headphones. She took one more look over at the corner of the crib Evie had dragged herself into. She looked down.

For just a second, she started to lean towards going over there, but she stopped. She looked at her headphones. She put them over her ears. Then, with only a little bit of hesitation, she hugged her doll close and laid down on her pillow, right there in the middle of the crib.

The headphones helped shut things out as they usually did, but they weren’t calming her down the way they usually did. Amaya frowned as she stared up at the ceiling.

Something distracted her and made her look to her left. Evie had been on her side, up against the edge of the crib. Amaya looked right as she rolled over.

“Mmph?”

Evie rolled over right on top of Amaya. And the seat of her diaper landed right on Amaya’s face.

…

Evie wasn’t sure when she fell asleep, but when she woke up, it was still dark. The door was still closed. Inara was nowhere in sight. So why…?

“Mmmph…mmmph…..”

She frowned and rubbed her eyes the best she could. She felt something weird underneath her, was she sitting on a pillow? She placed her hands under her and tilted her head up. She saw a pillow underneath her for some reason, but…that wasn’t what she was laying on.

“Amaya…?!”

Amaya was weakly wriggling and murmuring some muffled plea from the center of the crib…where she was currently trapped underneath Evie’s bottom. For the second time that night, Evie’s jaw hung open. How had she wound up under there?! Why was she in the middle of the crib!? Whatever - the how and why wasn’t really relevant  at the moment was it? She put her hands under herself and tried to roll over, first to the left, then to the right, but there was no strength left in her arms to move herself with.

‘Oh my god, I can’t believe I used the last of my strength throwing a doll and some headphones…!’ Evie cursed herself as she nonetheless tried to get herself up anyway she could but the only thing all of her failed attempts to extricate herself from Amaya accomplished was shifting her stomach this way and that way over and over, a  decision it eventually voiced its objection to with a loud rumble. The rumble quickly became a series of cramps, and…

‘Oh, no, no, no! Please don’t! C’mon, just hold it for once…!’ Evie begged her own body to no avail. Her attempts to move stopped as her body tensed up and shifted into the best squatting position it could manage while she was laying on her back. Evie whimpered as she felt the by now all too familiar sensation of her body pushing, followed by a mushy invader that started in her seat and gradually spread outwards. Except this time, her bottom wasn’t the only victim.

“Mmmph…! Mmmph!”

Evie could hear Amaya’s pacified noises becoming more urgent as she dirtied her seat right on top of her friend’s face.

“Amaya, I can’t stop it, I’m sorry…!” Evie whimpered. She tried once more to get herself up. Her diaper did lift a couple inches off of Amaya. Then Evie released her breath as she felt her body push again. More sludge piled into her diaper, pushing the full padding outwards into the couple inches of space between the diaper and Amaya’s face, covering her up again. Then Evie’s strength gave out and she fell back down, squishing Amaya underneath the entire thing.

“Nnn…Amaya…”

Evie really did try. She kept trying to move even as her eyes slid closed. But she had nothing left. Her tank was utterly empty. Sadly, her stomach wasn’t quite yet. The last thing Evie felt as she drifted off to sleep was her diaper continuing to grow fuller as she pushed more mess into it and trapped Amaya even worse under her mushier and mushier seat…